When we threaten a child, it speaks of a relationship gone awry. A relationship in which there is no mutual, respectful reciprocity. And the only way that the adult can wield power over the child, is to threaten.
It also speaks about the absence of connection between the adult and the child.
A relationship should never be about threats, control, or power. It should be about the connection that two people have with each other.
And so it should be the same between a parent, a teacher, or a significant adult, and a child. But when an adult uses threats to control a child or exercise power over a child, the adult, unintentionally though it may be, fractures the connection between himself or herself and the child.
While children are often very forgiving, when an adult uses threats too often, that connection may become, with time and with continual experience, increasingly difficult to reestablish.
Connect with children through love, empathy, compassion, kindness, and understanding, and our children will grow to become loving, empathetic, compassionate, kind, and understanding. Control children with threats and we disconnect from them because they become distrustful and fearful of us.